SPARF: Press week 16 ------------------------------------------------------- Press from the New Sturt Blues ------------------------------------------------------- ------------------------------------------------------- Press from the Christminster Clerics ------------------------------------------------------- Some of the excitement around Christminster about contending for gold (and having a full list for the first time in a long time) has been tainted by the depressing prospect of no 2001 season. It will be hard for the boys to give 110% this week, when it is so uncertain what they are playing for. ------------------------------------------------------- Press from the Uluru Dingoes ------------------------------------------------------- Another average performance for TinHead last round. There were 3 upsets in Gold and 2 in Silver last round. This round sees 8 cross-divisional games, which TinHead is unable to frame odds for. Odds should be offered for all games next round. TinHead offers the following odds for the coming round: GOLD (CUP RACE) Victorian_Mandarins__________ 1/4 v Krazy_Kenora_Kangari_________ 13/4 New_Sturt_Blues______________ EVENS v Nar_Nar_Goon_________________ 4/5 Uluru_Dingoes________________ 4/7 v Limboland_Mists______________ 11/8 Port_Coquitlam_Circus_Stars__ 4/7 v Livermore_Rowdy_Yobbos_______ 6/4 RELEGATION Warrnambool_Sea_Hawks________ 1/3 v Melbourne_Bloods_____________ 5/2 Silicon_Valley_Angels________ 8/15 v Rockdale_Radishes____________ 13/8 Daveland_Warriors____________ 4/7 v Windy_Hill_Superstars________ 6/4 ------------------------------------------------------- Press from the Himeji Herons ------------------------------------------------------- For the want of Michael Lloyd lining up in the goalsquare! Actually, if the blame were to rest with anyone, it could be Scott Cummins, who, although he should have had a day out, managed a solitary behind for the day. Kitty Chan, still not herself after suffering at the claws of Roxburgh, also spent time in the sin-bin for missing a shot completely. Takano Hana would also have been in the sin bin except he wouldn't fit. Oh, and he was injured, too! All in all, the final scoreline reflected the closeness of the two teams. Honours went to the better team on the day. We just hope we can square the ledger next year in Gold! Injuries are starting to be a concern in the lead-up to relegation. Hopefully we will still have enough to overcome the Sluggers, who we suspect will be our opponents in the first week. Watch out Darwin - we want your scalps! Chris Paragreen Manager, Himeji Herons "Gambaroh Himeji! Hustle! Hustle! Hustle!" ------------------------------------------------------- Press from the Buffalo Knights ------------------------------------------------------- Magicians have been brought into the Buffalo training facility. Not to heal the 5 injured players the Knights picked up in the final game of the season, but to magically rig the re-league games so that the Knights play the worst possible Silver team. Missing 2 mobiles, Coach Bridget Fonda was dismayed. "Man, you work all year and then this happens. I don't quite know how yet, but I'm gonna blame the Blues for this. Somehow this is all their fault." Full page ads were taken in local news media including all 27 local Buffalo tv stations publicly blaming the New Sturt Blues for the Knights injuries. Oddly enough, no one is blaming Kitty Chan for anything, but Kitty was seen taking in a flick at the drive-in with Neve Campbell. Back home in Buffalo, two woman watching the magicians go to work at the Knights practice, Mrs. Olive Spamm, of Leeds, and her companion, Mrs. Evvy Dent, were dismayed by the performance. "Sure they act like they know what they're doing, but the harmonics of foxglove and eye of newt are in total conflict," ragged Olive, "this spell's never going to work." Evvy was more optimistic. "The spells might work if they pour in some grape Kool-Aid. You know, lemurs love grape Kool-Aid." Olive was enraged, "Lemurs?! Who said anything about lemurs, you bat!" ------------------------------------------------------- Press from the Manix Maulers ------------------------------------------------------- >From the sports pages of the Manix Sentinel-Tribune-Globe-Herald: Since there will soon be no more sports in Manix, all sports writers are hereby sacked. The editors have decided to replace this former sports section with a new section called "Her Section," a forum for women, by women, dealing with women's issues and women's choices, from a decidedly woman's point-of-view. Next week: Personal Image and Bodylove ------------------------------------------------------- Press from the The Mythstics ------------------------------------------------------- Playoffs time and the crystal ball's secrets are kept close to Venusia's = chest. Though given The Mythstics' recent form there are no prizes for guessing how = their roller coast season will climax (or not).