Everybody has heard of the worldwide Sister Cities projects, how they have brought people together and fostered understanding and friendship between cities, nations and regions. In emulation of that great program, we now present a new parallel project. In relation to all the military bases and other military presence this great country of ours has bestowed on the rest of the world, we now are organizing equalizing military presence in your own states, your own towns, your own neighborhoods. Just think, in the same way we are occupying cities in Iraq, you can have your own military base in parks and squares in your town. We plan to also get our own arms industry to help fully equip Iraqi, Japanese, German, and Afghani soldiers in their own army, navy and air force bases on American soil. Can you imagine what it will be like to have an Afghani Special Forces base in your city. Who better to protect you from terrorism than the very people we have "rescued" from that fate so many times in our past. Surely they will really know what it was really like to face the kind of circumstance we brought our military to their countries for, and concommitantly they will know more than anyone else how best to make us feel the same kind of safety and security that we have delivered so potently to them and theirs.

That all being said, the program as proposed plans the following initial troop placements here in my home town of Tacoma Washington:

• An Iraqi Military Base in our venerable Wright Park, near the core of the Tacoma downtown area. We hope to bring in some of the leftover Katrina Trailers, as the soldiers will be not acclimatized enough to our weather to be able to tolerate our winter weather. We feel these can be placed between Tacoma Avenue and I Street, more or less surrounding the Stadium Thriftway and the nearby car dealerships where the troops will be able to handily maintain order at the high school, direct traffic, and help themselves when need be to foods when they need to at the store, as well as private transportation in terms of the new cars there.
• An Afghani Special Forces Base Occupying the present site of the Golf Course in Fircrest, where these young peole will be able to become experts at snipering and placement and usage of various kinds of munitions and chemical weapons.
• A Japanese Air Force Base replacing McCord. Perhaps we could change the name to the Yamamoto Air Force Base. We hope among other things that the Japanese will help the Afghani special forces learn how to use the same smart and large bombs we used to such great effect in Afghanistan (this includes of course the WMD scale "conventional weaponry" used there). Who better to trust in such training than our own long term allies.
• An Italian Military Base replacing Fort Lewis, which we are hoping Anxiously will be Called the Musolini Military Base. We hope very much to get the Pope's blessing for this installation.
• A German Submarine base on City Waterway. Perhaps initially we could get them going with some of our older Polaris or Trident models until we have a chance to upgrade them to something more respectable.

The Iraqi base will be the flagship step in our project. As such we are presently looking for volunteers and donations immediately toward organization to this end. We would very much like to see Iraqi soldiers marching around Stadium High School by the start of the school year in September 2008. We hope, of course, that other communities great and small will follow our lead in these matters.

Now part of the advantages here will be jobs. We will need to arm the Iraqis with guns, personnel carriers, and tanks for their occupation of the core area, and though the Japanese and Germans need to help manage the building of airplanes and submarines for them, given the unfortunate degeneration of the level of education in our country over the last 7 years, but still we hope to see a lot of the lower level line workers who build this weaponry to still be local people. Perhaps we can have some tacoma workers paint the lines on the planes, or shine shoes for the German submarine officers, for instance. At any rate, we hope some of this money will come back to our community, somehow, please.

We are also hoping, and this is the main point of this whole project, to achieve that same level of protection against random and dangerous acts of terrorism here in Tacoma, and eventually throughout the whole country, that we know from the word of the Bush Administration that we have brought to other countries around the world. I know my neighbors can't wait to see Iraqi soldiers marching, fully armed and confident, though the streets of our communities, and to know with certainly that those Afghan special forces are well trained to shoot or blow up anything that gets in their way, and that they are at close hand should opportunity show them a necessary deed. Yes, we will all truly know what we have done for the rest of the world, and perhaps, finally, the world will be better for it.

Please send all monies in support of this project in care of Xeno Campanoli, Brother Bases Commercial, 5101 N. 45th St., Tacoma, WA, 98407-3717. The Brother Bases Project is Not a Non-Profit Organization, and all monies will be handled by me, Xeno Campanoli, as I see fit. If you wish to send money to the UFPPC please see their site at: http://www.ufppc.org.