{"id":1050,"date":"2015-03-17T12:40:30","date_gmt":"2015-03-17T20:40:30","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.eskimo.com\/~nanook\/nook\/?p=1050"},"modified":"2015-03-17T12:40:30","modified_gmt":"2015-03-17T20:40:30","slug":"old-people-advertisements","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.eskimo.com\/~nanook\/2015\/03\/17\/old-people-advertisements\/","title":{"rendered":"Old People Advertisements"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\" alignright\" src=\"https:\/\/pbs.twimg.com\/profile_images\/1734721280\/old.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"300\" height=\"400\" \/><span style=\"font-family: tahoma,arial,helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; color: #800000;\">\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 I&#8217;m getting a lot of those old people advertisements in the mail these days.\u00a0 The ones I really hate are the, &#8220;You&#8217;re almost dead, give us your money now&#8221;, advertisements, like the <a href=\"Neptune%20Society\">Neptune Society<\/a>.\u00a0 I always questioned the name of their organization, <a title=\"God of Freshwaters and Seas\" href=\"http:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Neptune_%28mythology%29\">Neptune<\/a> was God of the Seas was he not?\u00a0 What does the Neptune Society do?\u00a0 <strong>They burn people<\/strong>.\u00a0 They should be called The <strong>Satan Society<\/strong> if you ask me.\u00a0 I tell me wife, I don&#8217;t want to be burned when I die, if you can&#8217;t afford a burial then donate my body to medical science.\u00a0 It&#8217;s not that I&#8217;ll be using my body any more once I&#8217;m gone, it&#8217;s just the symbolism of the thing.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: tahoma,arial,helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; color: #800000;\">\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Advertisements for <span style=\"color: #ffcc00;\">incontinence<\/span> supplies, maybe that will be a problem some day, but not yet.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: tahoma,arial,helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; color: #800000;\"><strong>\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 AARP<\/strong>, <strong>A<\/strong>busing <strong>A<\/strong>ged <strong>R<\/strong>epeatedly for <strong>P<\/strong>rofit.\u00a0 Luckily my recycle bin is between my mailbox and the front door.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: helvetica; font-size: 12pt; color: #800000;\">\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 I know it&#8217;s only going to get worse.\u00a0 Sometimes I wonder how much the stress of all this crap contributes to premature ageing and death.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 I&#8217;m getting a lot of those old people advertisements in the mail these days.\u00a0 The ones I really hate are the, &#8220;You&#8217;re almost dead, give us your money now&#8221;, advertisements, like the Neptune Society.\u00a0 I always questioned the name &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/www.eskimo.com\/~nanook\/2015\/03\/17\/old-people-advertisements\/\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1050","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","wpautop"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.eskimo.com\/~nanook\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1050","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.eskimo.com\/~nanook\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.eskimo.com\/~nanook\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.eskimo.com\/~nanook\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.eskimo.com\/~nanook\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1050"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.eskimo.com\/~nanook\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1050\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.eskimo.com\/~nanook\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1050"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.eskimo.com\/~nanook\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1050"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.eskimo.com\/~nanook\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1050"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}