I’m having some problems with depression relating to my life situation.  Maybe it’s a hazard of getting old.

     My mother passed several years ago about this time of the year.  My father’s health is not good.  My father is as atheistic as it gets and he is as stubborn as it gets a well. He believes that once your dead that’s it, there is nothing after.  I don’t share those beliefs.  I feel like I’m grieving for him while he’s still alive.  God has impacted my life in a big way, I know God is real.

     Then my wife, Tina, took a job with QFC where she is working, in theory midnight to 8:30AM, in practice often midnight to 9:30-10:00 AM which leaves me alone all night and to put it mildly I’m not loving it.

     And after 2-1/2 years in prison, I’m still working my way out of debt so we really need both of our incomes.

     I know my wife loves me, else she wouldn’t have waited for me while I was in prison.  Intellectually I know that, but it’s hard for me to feel it when she isn’t here most nights.  Thoughts come to me that I don’t want to have.  I find it difficult to sleep and then difficult to function in the day which doesn’t help the income situation.

    While I was in prison, my wife started attending a local church.  I want to attend but they are not making it easy and really I’m not feeling welcome there so I don’t know what to do.  I know if I went somewhere else my wife would go to but she’s made friends there and I don’t want to take her away from that.