Fight Club is one of my favourite films, and this is one of my favourite quotes from that film:
Tyler’s First Rule of Innovation:
No fear. No distractions. The ability to let that which does not matter truly slide.”
Had a disturbing dream last night where we cooked our Doberman and were slicing her up like a giant ham. I had suspected she was a bit psychic because when we use dog treats to train her, left paw or right paw (trying to get her to learn a left-right abstraction as I was able to do with a previous dog), she often gets impatient and anticipates the paw I’m going to ask for. I thought perhaps it was body gestures she was picking up on and tried hard to avoid this by first taking a position and then without moving deciding what paw I’d ask for, but still she’d usually get it right. Then I stopped verbalizing altogether and I could get her through the whole routing just by thinking what I wanted her to do. So last night after I had this dream, I awoke, it’s 4:30AM, in my mind, I asked her to come to us and she got up and walked into our room.
Then another where it was just the day I was being release from prison. I am approaching the time I will be released from community custody but it’s been nearly three years and I still have dreams of the time near my release date in prison.
Shoreline’s solution to the fact that the road is now too narrow after they’ve added a big curb for no good reason since neither a side walk or bike lane continues past 5th.
Paint a double yellow stripe down the middle and it’s all good. Never mind the fact that a car can’t really fit there. Notice to the right by the stop sign, there is NOTHING past that curb, it serves absolutely no purpose other than as an additional waste of tax payer dollars.
Here is the other end of it. You’ll notice the road doesn’t go past this intersection, which is why there is no significant traffic, which is why a $680,000 divided bike lane was totally unnecessary.
For contrast, here is a picture of the road at this intersection that goes in either direction perpendicular to this road, 1st Ave.
1st Avenue, which actually DOES go somewhere and actually has some real traffic, has neither a divided bike trail or even side walks! Incredible.
24 more days to go until I’m no longer under community custody. 24 days until freedom with a little “f“.
When I exited prison, we had ongoing therapy outside prison for a year. Our therapist had multiple groups one person who finished and for whom community custody ended, went out and drank himself into a coma and died.
On the 10th of April, funds permitting, I intend to go out to The Rock, a wood fired pizza place that makes, or at least did six years ago, the most excellent pizza and not bad drinks. This will be at the Lynnwood location. A note, not all of these restaurants are created equal, not being allowed to go to Lynnwood, I tried the one on Queen Anne, it was a massive disappointment.
Best Pizza Anywhere!
4010 196th Street SW
Lynnwood, WA 98036
I’m planning on being there around 8 PM. I don’t plan on drinking myself into a coma, so for those of you hoping this would be my demise you’ll have to wait for another opportunity.
This will be my freedom celebration, and for those who would like to join you’re welcome, but my funding situation presently doesn’t make it possible for me to buy for everyone, so if you come you’ll need to do so on your own tab, sorry.
I’m, or at least my workstation, is functional again. It’s a bit ugly when I boot because I can’t get Plymouth to work properly no matter what I do. This is with Ubuntu 14.10, it worked with 14.04 and a 3.13.x kernel, but something broke in 14.10, I tried reverting to a 3.13.x kernel, no good. I read some others had success with a 3.18.x kernel, I’m running 3.18.9 now, still no good. I’ve tried pretty much every fix I can find to no avail. It just spits out a bunch of error messages.
I would be happy without it and just the normal 4-penge boot and start-up messages, but it seems that lightdm depends upon it, so can’t do that. For now I guess I just have to live with the error messages.
On a plus side, I was able to really fine-tune the kernel to the hardware and work-load that I have and, until I run out of memory (I have 4GB on this box) it performs quite well. Once it goes into swap hell, well it performs like any machine in swap hell. I’d add RAM if this was an ordinary PC, but being a MacPro 1,1 it requires ECC registered memory which is 8-10x the price.
25 Days until freedom (with a little “f“), 25 days until I’m no longer under community custody. Freedom with a big “F” doesn’t exist in this country, the constitution has pretty much been re-interpreted out of existence, any more but freedom with a little “f” I guess is better than no freedom at all.
My right to vote may not be restored for months, that requires a judge signing a document that basically says the DOC has carried out the sentence I was assigned. In actually, the DOC went far beyond what the court assigned, by placing on me numerous restrictions that were neither ordered by the court nor required for safety, but I haven’t the money to fight that in court and 25 days from now it will be largely moot. And I guess until that happens I can’t travel outside of the country without permission. Mostly moot since the only country I could possibly afford to travel to is Canada and I’m pretty sure they won’t let me in now.
If I understand Washington state law, there is no possibility of getting my right to own a firearm restored as long as a no contact order remains in effect, and that’s another 4-1/2 years away. Not that it really matters since the only gun I’ve ever owned is an antique that I would have been afraid to fire given it’s condition, willed to me by a family friend when he passed away, and subsequently stolen by a satellite dish installer.
Life goes on in some form I guess.
I’m still operating in crippled mode here, my 1680×1050 monitor is operating at 1024×768 because Ubuntu issued an update that blew out my Nvidia drivers, my pre-emptive kernel, my nx-libs which freenx and x2go rely on, among other things.
I can not get nvidia’s drivers from their website installed and the ones that are provided with the Ubuntu distribution never did work properly with my graphics card (an antique GT7300).
I’ve complete rebuilt the kernel and they still won’t install although the original problem they complained about is gone. Frustrating!
Do you remember a point in your life where you imagine that, having done something very small and seemingly insignificant at the time, would have changed your entire life?
I’ve got one of those points. There was a girl in elementary school, fifth grade, that I had very strong feelings for. I believe way beyond a crush because those feelings never entirely went a way, But I was shy, afraid to express those feelings back then.
We went on a field trip and during the bus ride I was initially in a seat by myself. During the ride she came over and sat next to me, right up against me, and I was overwhelmed, and my shy nature at the time, I reacted by scooting over and making some room. She reacted by getting up and going to another seat and never spoke to me once after that. It was like that was some type of cosmic test and I failed, or maybe I didn’t in another life, in the quantum many worlds theory, somewhere out there is a me that had a Ward and June life and perhaps I’m envious of my other world self.
I believe, had I not moved away, she would have been my life mate, and life would be entirely different. I wouldn’t have spent 2-1/2 years in prison, wouldn’t have two estranged kids, wouldn’t have a kid that knows no other world except video games, or one that can’t spend more than half an hour with me before his girlfriend calls him back.
I love my wife and I know she loves me, but there are definitely some rough edges. But maybe this was meant to be, as hard and difficult as it sometimes is. Maybe those kids will do something worthwhile. Or maybe I’ll just live out my years disgruntled and die.
I have to go to sleep now after having just watched Django. Not sure it was the best material to watch just before falling asleep as dreams have already been weird and almost overwhelmingly intense recently.